Coffee vs. caffeine

Every now and then, a whole slew of articles come across my plate, seemingly designed to get me jumping for joy about something before I even have time to stop and understand what they're saying. That's the case today, as I find myself feeling swamped by the incredible news that "Studies show coffee is good for physical and mental health" - it's true!

Diabetes has been the latest focus of research, with coffee showing promising results in studies that compare consumption with diabetes rates. Reports suggest that people who drink six or seven cups a day were 50 percent less likely to develop Type 2 diabetes, said Dr. Robert Rushakoff, an endocrinologist with the University of California-San Francisco.

In addition to the research on diabetes, a Canadian study published this month showed that coffee may prevent gout. Other studies have suggested coffee could lower the risk of developing Parkinson's disease and Alzheimer's disease.

But that's not all! You could get a little wacky and "Throw a little java in your skin care routine":

But now research is emerging boasting the health benefits of coffee, from preventing colon cancer to fighting cavities. And now we have one more oh-so-pleasing fact to tack onto the list of reasons to drink coffee: it's good for your skin!

Many cultures are already aware of the cleansing, toning, and healing properties of coffee, both when ingested and when applied topically to the skin. In Russia, people often go to the bathhouse to scrub their bodies with coffee grounds, having found that they not only cleanse and exfoliate, but also moisturize, protect the skin from sun damage, and even eliminate cellulite! What's to lose?

What indeed? But what, you ask, could be responsible for such delightful benefits? I've got bad news: it sure ain't the caffeine, as "Caffeine may not give a jolt to health":

People report feeling more stressed out while caffeinated, Lane says, with good reason. In a study published in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine in 2002, he found that, after taking a caffeine pill equivalent to the amount in four or five cups of coffee, people showed an average 32% rise in the stress hormone adrenaline and a 3-millimeter rise in blood pressure. These effects lasted throughout the day after people took caffeine. A 5-millimeter rise in blood pressure leads to a 34% increase in the risk of stroke and a 21% increased risk of coronary heart disease, according to a review of nine large studies, and each millimeter rise adds an equivalent amount of risk, Lane says.

His studies also show that taking on difficult, mind-bending math problems while caffeinated produces more stress than either caffeine — or math — alone. Chronically high levels of stress can damage the blood vessels, kidneys and heart. "Caffeine exaggerates the effects of stress on the body as if the stress were worse," he says. "It doesn't just add stress, it multiplies."

But haven't they tested caffeine and proven that it helps with alertness? Well - turns out it helps your own perception of alertness, but when they actually try to measure concrete effects:

"What we find is that if you take caffeine away from caffeine drinkers, they perform worse than when they get caffeine and they perform worse than people who don't normally get caffeine," Rogers says. "The traditional interpretation … is that people do better on caffeine and that caffeine does make you more alert."

When people who are normally caffeine-free get caffeine, however, some studies show only a much smaller mental boost, while others show no boost at all, says Rogers, who published a review of related studies in the journal Psychopharmacology in 2005. It may be withdrawal that makes people falter, he says, not caffeine that makes them sharper. If they're not already coffee drinkers, taking up the habit won't help.

It could, however, hurt their hearts. Studies show an average blood pressure increase of 4/2 millimeters of mercury (mmHg) after taking caffeine, according to a 2004 review of research published in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine. That small spike won't matter much for most people, but it could exacerbate the condition of someone on the edge of heart problems.

Interesting. This particular article makes a nice bold claim that I don't really have time to research, but I present for discussion nevertheless:

"There are health benefits of coffee that have nothing to do with caffeine," Graham says. In fact, he adds: "There are no health benefits I've ever seen documented for caffeine."

Well, shoot. However! If it's not caffeine providing all the health benefits from drinking coffee, why, just exactly what it is? To the rescue comes a story headlined "Coffee's goodness is all in the antioxidants in the beans":

It's all about the beans. Coffee beans are a rich source of antioxidants - the same cancer-fighting, health-promoting plant nutrients found in blueberries and broccoli.

In fact, coffee may be the leading source of antioxidants in the American diet. According to Joe Vinson, professor in the Department of Chemistry at the University of Scranton in Pennsylvania, coffee contributes 31 percent of the total daily antioxidant intake, specifically antioxidants called phenolic acids.

These chemical good guys are associated with reduced risk of heart disease because they help prevent cholesterol buildup in the arteries. Even if you drink decaffeinated coffee you're still getting a healthy dose of antioxidants.

Outstanding! And remind me what I'll win?

Coffee consumption is emerging as one of the lifestyle habits associated with decreased risk of a number of ailments, including gallstones, kidney stones, certain cancers and Type 2 diabetes. Brains can benefit, too.

Coffee can lift your mood and treat headaches, and it is well established that a cup of java can reduce fatigue and improve mental focus.

There you have it, fine folks. After an exhaustive search of, uh, four or five articles, I believe I can safely say that... uh... that maybe I shouldn't have given up coffee, or something. And developing a caffeine pill habit might be a bad idea. In some ways. Oh, and I should be making an ointment out of the grounds for my skin condition. Because that's just how I want my skin to smell, dammit.