Aqua Dots GHB recall and Trip Report

A few days ago amazingdrx posted about Bindeez toys being pulled from shelves in Australia for having 1,4-butanediol in them (which metabolizes into GHB in the body), and now the American version -- Aqua Dots -- are being officially recalled as well. The story is all over the news today, but we here at DoseNation managed to get our hands on these Aqua Dots before the recall and had our resident guinea pig try a few. Here is our exclusive Aqua Dots trip report.

I opened my pack of Aqua Dots and wasn't sure if I should play with them or eat them, so I stuck a few in my mouth and started chewing while attempting to make an Aqua Dot castle with the rest. Although they taste like rubbery crap, I find the salty sensation of 1,4-butanediol dissolving into my mouth to be oddly sexual. I chew some more.

Ten minutes later my head is spinning and I can't keep my castle upright. I run my hands over all the Aqua Dots, feeling like a miser counting his fortunes. My body is lifting into space. I feel quite funky.

A half hour later I am running through the house with no clothes on. Shiva take me now! I channel the ancient spirits and begin my fertility dance. Soon the moon with be in my house. Tonight we kill the pig and rejoice!

Forty-five minutes in I am searching the TV channels for signs of the impending apocalypse. I can't see very well, but Oprah keeps saying something about the fatted cow, or the phantom couch, or the frantic clown... I can't figure it out, but I am hooked now. She has a dire look on her face. The end is near.

After about an hour I decide I haven't chewed enough beads. I dig in for round two, but refuse to eat the red ones. The red ones are Satan's beads. Back Satan! Out of my house of worship!

I don't know how long it's been, but I slather my neck with butter to stop the itching, mites have gotten under my skin. I chew more beads. The reds stare at me with their demonic eyes. I put the red Aqua Dots down the drain. I can hear them scream and shout curses at me as I wash them down. They say I will be reborn in hell as a mutant cripple in eternal pain. But I am the lord now, their words can't hurt me. I turn on the garbage disposal and my head lights up with holy fire. It is I who will have the last laugh!

After a few hours the effects wear off, and my castle is destroyed. If it weren't for the mites and the presence of Satan I would try these things again, but for now I am swearing off Aqua Dots as bad medicine. Leave those things for the hardcore, and watch out for the red ones.

I couldn't have said it better myself.